Prefacio Prólogo I. Esos primeros meses 1 Comienzo de la vida con tu bebé
2 Su mundo cambia
3 Desorrollo de la inteligencia del bebé
II. La salud y la familia 4 Atención médica para tu bebé
5 Sólo para papá 6 Si la mamá está sola
7 Tres generaciones en la misma casa III. Tu bebé en movimiento 8 El bebé está mucho más activo
9 A prueba de accidentes en casa 10 Las primeras comidas sólidas del bebé
11 Jugar con tu bebé
IV. La etapa de bebé queda atrás 12 ¡Se mete en todo!
13 Hora de comida de mesa
14 Deleitarse con la criatura y enseñarle 15 Hacia tu futuro
Apéndice Bibliografía anotada Índice
Author
Jeanne Warren Lindsay Jeanne Warren Lindsay Acerca de la autora Jeanne Warren Lindsay es autora de dieciséis libros para y sobre adolescentes embarazadas y que crían a sus hijos. Para 2004, se habían vendido casi 700,000 ejemplares de sus libros. Los libros de Lindsay tratan de asuntos relacionados con el embarazo de adolescentes, la crianza y la adopción desde la perspectiva de la familia natural, así como de relaciones entre adolescentes. Su obra Teen Dads: Rights, Responsibilities and Joys fue seleccionado por la American Library Association como uno de los libros recomendados para lectores jóvenes reacios. Lindsay ha laborado con cientos de adolescentes gestantes y en crianza. Fue ella quien desarrolló el Teen Parent Program en Tracy High School, Cerritos, California, y coordinó el programa durante muchos años. La mayoría de sus libros son para adolescentes gestantes y en crianza; para ilustrar los conceptos, a menudo se citan comentarios hechos en entrevistas. Lindsay creció en una finca en Kansas. Durante 43 años ha residido en la misma casa en Buena Park, California. Le encanta visitar el Oeste Medio, pero dice que ahora es adicta a la vida en el sur de California. Ella y su esposo Bob tienen cinco hijos y siete nietos. Linsay es redactora de PPT Express, un boletín trimestral para educadores y otras personas que trabajan con adolescentes embara-zadas y que crían a sus hijos. A menudo participa en conferencias por todo el país pero dice que lo que prefiere es entrevistar a los jóvenes para sus libros o escribir bajo el olmo del patio de su casa. Illustrator
Untitled Document David Crawford illustrator, Teen Dads and other Teens Parenting Books; also Teenage Couples Series: David Crawford, M.A., has been a teacher, counselor, program administrator, and photographer of family life for 30 years. He has worked with thousands of pregnant and parenting teens as the director of the Program for Pregnant and Parenting Students, William Daylor High School, Elk Grove Unified School District, Sacramento, California. David uses photography as a teaching aid, blending the art of photography with education and enhancement of students' self-esteem. He is a leader in the field of digital photography as part of the Digital High School Program. David and his wife, Peggy, have two sons, Alton and christopher, both 31, and a daughter, Terrica, 23, who has given David and Peggy a granddaughter. Teaching Help
Teen Mothers Read to Babies
By Susan Straub, Director, READ TO ME, Teachers & Writers Collaborative, NYC
READ TO ME, a program of Teachers & Writers Collaborative in New York City, has been changing the world through Pat the Bunny. Perhaps you’ll try it in your school or organization. The fun is worth the effort, and the possible benefits can be immediate and long range.
The program is usually seven sessions. I prefer to begin with books without words and end with a real live writer/illustrator who will autograph copies of her books for the students to keep and read to their babies. Keep these three things constantly in mind for each session:
* Must be fun. * Be loaded with baby books. * Be a self-contained unit if possible.
In my experience, pregnant and parenting teens have some knowledge of Dr. Seuss, Curious George, and a smattering of other books, perhaps tied to films, TV, or toys. Most picture books which feature people of color, or deal with current situations, are a revelation to the students. And a reassuring, welcome revelation.
Yes, some say big teenagers would rather die than read children’s books, but wait. These books are for their child(ren), and if read to, a simple enough demand, their child(ren) will get a jump on education, being literate, reading. And then who can refuse to lift the flap? Smell the flowers? Do the peanut butter and jelly song?
The first three sessions involve reading books without words, reading baby-baby books, and reading picture books for toddlers.
Session 1. Books Without Words
This session is based on the point-and-name-it principle of reading. We start with a Polaroid photo of mommy’s face, and read it. There is usually much squirming and injured vanity, but mommy’s face is usually the first and most beautiful image for every baby. Point out what you see and name it: eye, mouth, bangs, smile.
From here you can read pictures, catalogs, Time magazine, the advertising inserts for clothes or toys. You can read colors, shapes, identities (taxi driver, mommy, older sister, tennis player, singer).
Following along quickly, I get students in twos or threes to read books without words to each other. Ask any bookstore or children’s librarian for suggestions. Our small collection includes books by John Goodall, Mercer Mayer, John Steptoe, Mitsumasa Anno, and Emily Arnold McCully. Reading together is a bonding experience and very friendly. In fact, this whole session is a good ice-breaker.
If there is time, we end with How Anansi Obtained the Sky God’s Stories, an African Folktale from the Ashanti Tribe, Children’s Press, Chicago, 1991. The students follow the wordless picture book as the professional story teller tells of the stories in each of us.
Session 2. Reading Books—Books—Books
Some of the most important sessions of READ TO ME are those which have piles of children’s books in boxes and on tables provocatively available for students to read. Several times I have said nothing for 40 minutes, and each student is quietly giggling, focused, moving her lips while she reads in private pleasure.
This is key. Without the intimate pleasure, experience, built-up awareness of the range and fun of books for children, these new moms may continue to wait for proper schooling to read to their babies, and miss the whole point.
Session 3. Library Connection and Lapsit/Toddler Demonstration
Many moms are unconvinced their children are ready to be read to, so it is essential to hook into the local public library for two clear reasons: The books are there, and children’s librarians engage the moms and babies in rhymes, games, and reading fun.
Pamphlets and programs are available. An excellent one from the American Library Association is "How to Raise a Reader." Librarians are often eager to do a program for teens and tots, and tend to excuse those library books which were lost in fifth grade and have kept the teens away.
Session 4. Make a Book for Baby
Because of the brief time usually available, it is essential to assemble materials which make successful completion likely in one session. Cloth books are wonderful (see Anne Pellowski’s essential book from Chilton Book Co., Radnor, PA 19089), and "key ring flip" books are easily assembled. Materials needed are luggage tags, key rings larger than a 25¢ coin, scissors, glue, old magazines, colored pens/pencils, clear contact paper.
Choose a clear idea quickly: stories, family albums, concepts like vegetables, ABCs, faces, or things baby knows. Once the idea is conceived, cutting out appropriate pictures is easy. Then glue, label, and cover with clear contact paper, and a book is made suitable for jeans pocket or baby’s diaper bag. And because the baby can hold and wave it, the book is also a toy.
Session 5. Visiting Writer or Illustrator
Admittedly, New York City has many of these people easily accessible, but you can probably find a locally published artist through the library, art school, or publisher. "Published" means copies are available to purchase or get donated for each teenager. A children’s book in the hand goes home and gets read by everyone in the house, including the baby.
Another great resource is Pat Cummings’ Talking with Artists (Simon & Schuster). She includes pictures and biographies of many wonderful children’s writers and illustrators, and her style is engaging and second best to having the actual person in your classroom.
See also the Meet the Author series from Richard Owen Publications, Katonah, NY.
That’s it! It’s a brief description, but look one teen mom and her baby reading, and you’ll know it’s worth a try.
Sharing Session
1. Describe something good about your child.
2. Describe something about your child which concerns you (bugs you).
3. Describe something you’ve done with your child in the past 24 hours — in addition to the essentials of feeding, putting to bed, etc.
Asking parenting class participants to answer these questions individually generally provides insight into current concerns of the class. When one teaches to current concerns, s/he is likely to make more impact in improving parenting skills than when s/he covers topics students don’t feel apply to their children now. Because of their stage of development, many teens find it difficult to look very far ahead. Most young parents, as you know, want to be good parents. Teaching to their “now” is likely to help them achieve their goal.
To Help Children Know Their Absent Father
Additional resource for Your Baby's First Year, chapter 6, "If Mom Is Alone." Guidelines for Mothers' To Help Children Know Their Absent Father Prepared by Ann O'Sullivan and Sheila Foley, Social Work Department, Rotunda Hospital, Dublin, Ireland
1. Think Ahead.
* Your child will want to know who his/her dad is, why he doesn't live with you, and whether s/he can meet him.
2. Involve the Child's Dad as Early as Possible.
* Tell him you're pregnant. * If you would like him to attend ante-natal classes, or to be present at the birth, suggest this. * Discuss with him, his attitude toward involvement with the child, e.g., joint parenting, keeping in touch.
3. Talk to Your Child About His/Her Dad
* Talk about ordinary things, e.g., Dad's interests, his family, etc. * Be honest with your child. Be positive about his/her dad. * Start early and give information appropriate to the child's age. Add to this as s/he grows up.
4. Be Creative.
* Use opportunities to let your child know his/her dad. * Don't tear up his letters and photos. These will be valuable for your child. * Consider keeping a scrapbook or magic book for your child, where photos and other mementos of his/her dad can be kept and used with the child. * Dad's name on the birth certificate gives the child a good sense of his/her identity.
5. Encourage Contact.
* The best way of letting your child know his/her dad is to encourage regular contact between them whenever possible. * This may be painful for you in view of your own relationship. However, it is important to remember that your child's relationship with his/her dad is something separate. * Focus on the best interests of your child.
6. Seek Help.
* Do not hesitate to seek help from family, friends or professionals in helping your child to know his/her dad.
Smoke and Baby Bottles By Leora Busker and Donelle Bartling, GRADS, Kelly Walsh HS, Casper, WY
We knew a few of our pregnant and parenting students were smoking, so we filled baby bottles with cigarette butts and ashes. We placed these bottles on the tables in the parenting classroom.
When our students arrived and saw our display, they were absolutely irate over the disgusting odor and appearance. They said we had no business putting that stuff in baby bottles. We made our point without lecture or handouts.
Teaching Activities
"No to Smoking, Drugs, Alcohol." Activity for Your Pregnancy and Newborn Journey, chapter 5, Smoke and Baby Bottles By Leora Busker and Donelle Bartling, GRADS, Kelly Walsh HS, Casper, WY
We knew a few of our pregnant and parenting students were smoking, so we filled baby bottles with cigarette butts and ashes. We placed these bottles on the tables in the parenting classroom.
When our students arrived and saw our display, they were absolutely irate over the disgusting odor and appearance. They said we had no business putting that stuff in baby bottles.
We made our point without lecture or handouts.
Case Study: "I Didn't Feel Comfortable There" Activity for Your Baby's First Year, chapter 7, "Three-Generation Living." Case Study: "I Didn't Feel Comfortable There": Celina, 17
Almost as soon as Scott and I knew I was pregnant, I moved in with him and his parents. They didn't know I was pregnant, and he took two months to tell them. He knew he could count on his mom, but he took forever to tell his dad because he's an alcoholic. Scott thought his dad would beat him up. He waited until his dad was in a happy mood, and he told him. His dad took it okay, and said he wished we had told him a long time ago.
It was hard living with Scott's family. I didn't feel comfortable. His mom wouldn't let me cook or clean. She kept telling me to make myself at home, but she wouldn't let me help. I'm used to cleaning and cooking, but his mom would say, "No, you don't have to do it," and I would feel bad because I wanted to do it.
I came back home about three months before Jamal was born. I was homesick. I needed my family, and we weren't married at that time. Also, I wasn't eating well at Scott's house because his mom really didn't have time to cook. I was afraid to cook whatever I wanted because they might think I'm weird. Id wake up hungry and I'd be too embarrassed to go to the kitchen and eat.
I wasn't used to their food, and sometimes I didn't like what she cooked. I'm used to Mexican food. They're white, and they'd make different foods like steak, and I'm not used to that. We got married a month ago, a week after the baby was born. I haven't moved back with him yet, and he wants me to go back next weekend. It's okay with my parents because we're married. They're sad, though, because they know I'm leaving with the baby.
I love my in-laws a lot but I don't feel comfortable about moving back there. His dad smokes and so does my husband, and I don't think it's a good environment for our baby. Scott would never smoke around me, but still, that smell on him makes me sick. I tell him to wash his hands and brush his teeth before he holds the baby.
I used to smoke, but I quit while I was pregnant. Now I can't stand smoke. When I was pregnant, I'd be sitting in their living room and his dad would start smoking. I'd run out the door because it made me sick. Scott would get mad at me and tell me I was rude, but I couldn't help it.
Scott is fixing his room for the baby and me. He says, "We're married and we have to live together and work things out." I tell him I want to live with him, but it's his dad. He smokes and smokes, and that's not good for the baby.
I suppose I'll move back over there, but I don't want to.
Discussion Questions:
1. Why wasn't Celina happy living with her parents-in-law? 2. Why do you think Scott's mom wouldn't let Celina cook or clean? 3. Write a skit in which Celina and her mother-in-law discuss the cooking/cleaning issue. In your skit, have each woman express her feelings in an honest, open, and caring fashion. 4. Why is Celina so opposed to living in a home with smokers? What effect might this have on her baby? 5. What would you do if you were Celina and you felt this strongly that you didn't want your baby exposed to second-hand smoke?
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